on February 24th, 2007 by mark
A couple of friends and some family have inquired about the post two ago. Allow me to explain the mundane particulars:
As the adviser for both the yearbook and the newspaper at the high school, I have created several very specific situations in order to make both publications work. I enjoy doing both and if I had my druthers, I’d do that–and that’d be it.
But, in order to be a full-time teacher, I also have to teach 3 literature classes. I enjoy doing those, as well–but sheer volume and weight have created such a condition that doing all three things, writing as a freelancer, raising a young daughter and being a caring husband are simply untenable. My time gets spread so thinly and the sheer volume of paperwork gets so overwhelming, that it is all I can do to go to work by 7, come home in time for dinner and collapse. Now, I cannot complain. There are those who work far harder than I, that’s certain.
However, in terms of running a successful program, I found that running both the yearbook and the newspaper is just a bit much. To be succinct, success is hard to achieve when you are pulled in every direction and you have to keep sacrificing this deadline for that deadline…
So, those are the mundane particulars. I have resigned from the newspaper effective in June. I’ll finish out the year, but beyond that I simply cannot split my professional–or even my personal–life in that many directions. It does not work.
As I reflected on this, I did so in very deep nuance and I decided to write a post on the specific feeling of failure–for that is what this is. It is an acceptance of limitations and that’s a healthy thing, but it’s a painful thing. My oldest brother, Doug, pointed out that failure is an absolute necessity if one is to succeed. And he is right, of course. This however, does not negate anything I wrote. There is much in life that is necessary for growth that is, nevertheless, painful to experience–failure among the rest.
However, I’m confident I’ve made the right decision for the students, for myself and for my family. And I’m truly appreciative to have been proven wrong in at least one instance of that post: I do indeed have that many people in my corner.
Thanks.
Posted in Family, Work/writing life
Thanks for the update
Life does has it challenges doesn’t it Mark. I for one have chosen a route where there is surprises around every corner when you work for yourself. But for the last 20 odd years Janet and I have made it work. All I can say is that You love what you do, you love your family, in the end you have everything. Its what spins my world everyday.
There will be the day when your true chosen path to being the uber wine writer which you love will prevail and that is all that you will do. Then there will not be all these other distractions. I know once I actually was able to leave the agency I worked at and made Rock’n Motion work, it became more clear. Not saying it happened over night *LOL* But a clearer path is is and happier one.
G